muted life
03.28.05 (10:46 pm) [edit]Life is going silently now, sometimes too silently that I forget to feel that I live. Sometimes I am reminded of life other than my office and sleep at home. I feel very uncomfortable when I talk to old friends(over phone ofcourse) for I so often forget what I told them and what I didnt.
I dont think I am missing anyone or anything now but am sure once I get out of this reckless working-sleeping schedule, I would miss many things. Nights are spend at my workplace and days go by without a trace. Sleep at day is not very pleasant particularl y in this dry hot summer. More trouble is caused by this cell phone I carry. I somehow couldnt mute it off for it is the only way to communicate to me for many a dear ones.
What I want is unanswerable! Am I happy is a mystery! I exist seems a myth! I need some colors...more sounds
everywhere
03.22.05 (7:17 pm) [edit]not all things need to be abstract but some things are best expressed this way. poetry is a best example in this regard. infact everything in literature that sounds abstract is poetry to me. i love poetry but i am so naive to understand it completely. but isnt that supposed to make it more interesting? yes it is...it grinds through my mind than something more clear..something that i understand more readily.
thinking on the same lines it is ironical to note that being abstract makes you remember it more. i dont mean only literature but there are lot of other things as well.a dream is the most interesting of them all, its abstract view of your inner mind...an abstract poem written by your mind wherein you should know to read between the lines to understand what it wants to convey. all dreams are well cherished for the simple reason that people dont understand it...if they do they lose their interest
randomness is also a form of abstractness! it gives more beauty than all the symmetries in the world
Things around me!
03.21.05 (3:32 pm) [edit]I am having a writers block right now and having started on over half a dozen topics, some of which I wrote for more than a few line, I felt that I was not doing justice for those subjects and I deleted them. I am just not in mood for philosophy and I have no time for science. So let me tell you what is around me now.
*I am sitting at my office, in a cubicle which I share with two project mates. Both have not come to office yet
*Apart from the standard computer and accessories stuff there is a water bottle, a notebook and my pen on the table.
*Its the first time I am observing my name in the name board. It somehow doesnt represent me for most of my name is left as initials(mine is really long name)
*There is a plate telling company's vision and values. It was present one fine morning. I dont know who put it there but I vow never to see it during work..lol
*Today there is a change in the office. They have placed beatiful plant-pots in corners of every cube. Each one looks different, atleast from what I can see craning my neck. The pot in my cube has 3-4 plants with beatiful light green leaves that have red veins. I would look at them closely but not now. There's time.
Ok. Thats it.
ET - When will we find it out?
03.16.05 (11:16 pm) [edit]Its been quite a while since I wrote a blog on science, the reason being that I am too occupied to do the detailed analysis that goes on with each entry. This time I thought of sharing some interesting information, it could be a touch old for I read it somewhere around 6 months back(6 months is a long time for this field..lol)
Its about extraterrestrial life - Is there a possibility that somewhere else in the universe living organisms exist? The answer is that the probability is very high, greater than 99%. In other terms science believes that they do exist and its only a matter of communicating with them.
The real factors for such a conclusion are - The universe has billions of galaxies each with trillions of stars and each star(most of which are bigger than the sun) has many planets around it. This calls for a huge amount of probable places that living organisms could exist. Such a huge probable area makes the probability really high.
One thing that scientists still havent concluded is how life formed on earth. Though the primeval conditions was a factor the real spark that formed life is still unknown (Interestingly there is a theory of panspermia that states that life was formed from organisms coming from outerspace - through meteors mostly). This factor could still lower the field of examination by scientists.
Time will answer all this but its going to answer very slow - for the field of search is incomparably large and there are huge limiting factors(communication for example). I dont expect a break through in my time - its sad in a way.
Back to work
03.15.05 (1:13 am) [edit]My vacation is over and am back to work. The luxurious one-week vacation would mean that I got to work more hours to complete my work(the release is 2 weeks from now). I am actually looking forward to it, for frankly I love this work and am always open to let myself crammed up with any sort of work.
But physically I am so tired that I cant do any work today. A 21 hour train journey doesnt help you to sit up all night in your desk and I plan to go early home and find some refreshing sleep. I need it badly.
The vacation was fine. My home, my parents, my lil sis everyone warmed me up.
The Travel
03.06.05 (3:02 pm) [edit]Am home. The tarvel was fine. I travelled without any incidents, though I had a few nervous moments imagining I would miss my connection train due to some train delay.
Train travels come in two parts : night and day. The variation is more pronounced to me than most for I cant sleep during night. I love travellng during the day and that was the reason the second day morning was eagerly awaited by me and it held its promise. After spending some time reading a book, I took to my favourite position. I stood near the door and start absorbing the enormous bounty that sped past me at the rate of knots. I love those sights. The enormous power and speed of the metalic beast gives only a snapshot of the outside world but it paints itself into various colors constantly, yet with some pattern to put up a good show that I always wanted to see.
The author of the book I was reading had said "India is a funny country. After travelling a good half hour outside any city, you find endless spaces either truly barren or lush green farms and only an occasional head at sight that you wonder where the 950 million people have gone to hiding". How true!!
The train speds past various fields with lonely farmhouses, barren lands laden with rocks, villages with no more than a dozen houses and a few more urbane localities. One moment I would be watching a group of thatched houses all neatly arranged and the next moment its gone as though it never existed. Mountains passby rather slowly showing off their might but then they all do find an end. Sometimes I have found no traces of human habitation for many a miles and I would wonder if any human has ever set foot on those barren rocks. India really could be a funny country.
Trains travel without any emotion for the nature outside. Thats the very reason that the outside world looks so colorful and sight-worthy. The travel ended and I got out of the train. I started my wait for the next journey.
the fun in losing my specs
03.02.05 (5:37 pm) [edit]This weekend I will be back home. Home is the place where I was brought up(from age 5 till 21) and where still my parents live with my sis and more so a place where I can be myself. Having said all this, I can stay there anymore for my work prevents it. Anyway no use talking about it. I am going for a week's vacation and I am excited.
The plans for this vacation h ave been laid far back but preparations have been done in the past 7 days only. I wanted to buy something for home but didn't. Its the classic example of me not knowing what to buy. Anyway that wouldnt bother people who are back there. They await me and me only.
Along with them a little devil would await me. He is our neghbours 3-year old who spends more time in my home rather than his home. He was very excited about me coming and he has grand plans to welcome me, ofcourse only if I get him a big list of things. I await to take him in my arms too - a moment I have to be very careful for he enjoys taking my spectacles and throwing it off...lol